Saturday, September 30, 2023

Keep your mind and spirit strong


This was a hard week physically: RA pain all over and intestinal issues. RA is an inflammatory autoimmune illness that primarily affects joints but also it affects your organ systems. Aside from deteriorated joints, my RA has manifested in inflammatory bowel disease. I have perforated my intestines several times, many hospitals stays and had two colon resections. So when I get a diverticulitis flare, I am scared. I am back on oral antibiotics for this diverticulitis attack but doctor said I may need to be hospitalized for IV antibiotic treatment (which I have had to do several times). Keeping my fingers crossed.

I am struggling with feeling sorry for myself. I have to stop my methotrexate while I heal but that just means more pain etc. Also, I am a vain grrl; so I hate that my hands/wrist are showing RA nodules and swollen joints. My hands are so pained and stiff in the morning, it is hard to carry a mug of coffee or write until they are warmed up. Then, they just ache and hurt the rest of the day. Hard to hold cell phone for more than a minute. The RA in my spine has me now getting epidurals for pain management and I have gotten cortisone injections in both hands, shoulders and knee. And PRP in my shoulders and knees. All these interventions hurt! But they give me some relief, however fleeting. I try to remain hopeful for  remission someday. But hard to stay positive when I have several health things hitting at once.

BUT,  then I remember how the fabulous Frida Kahlo continued painting and creating while bed ridden with severe pain and illness. And I think of Pierre-Auguste Renoir, French impressionist, who painted 400 canvases after he was diagnosed with RA. He became wheelchair bound and designed and developed a device that he attached to his hands just so that he could hold a paintbrush.




So, toughen up buttercup. And think positively. I remind myself to reframe my experiences and keep hope alive. And I remind myself to be grateful for all the blessing I do have. That's it, all I have to say on the matter. Thanks for listening.





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