Back again

Hola dear friends. It's me again. I once published a blog called Van Gogh Chica in the early 2000's. It focused on my Buddhism, my art, sex positive tales and every day musings. I loved it and it provided a creative release for me. After several years, traumatic events in my life caused me to retreat and I did not feel safe expressing myself freely for the world to read anymore so I deleted it. 

Sigh. I do regret that. I wish I had just taken it offline so that now, decades later  I could go back and wander through my pages. At the time, I felt vulnerable to judgement and criticism and so I even trashed my many handwritten journals that I had written from the mid 1980's to early 2000's. Again, I regret that. C'est la vie. 

Almost 20 years later,  I am in different place and am now returning to my creative and expressive practices. I liked my former blog name, Van Gogh Chica, because I am a painter and love Vincent Van Gogh; and I am Latina (hence, the "chica".) So I kept it. I tried to get a Van Gogh Chica url but it was not available. So the url is vangoghchica3@blogspot.com. This new blog will continue to be personal writings about my life and thoughts. Hopefully some art and some laughs as well. 

I was single, dating and adventurous in the original Van Gogh Chica. With the new Van Gogh Chica, I am now coupled but in a nontraditional way. Still adventurous. Two big differences from my former life are my entering the grey revolution and the sad fact that I now live with an autoimmune illness: rheumatoid arthritis. Both these developments  are undesirable but I try to make the best of it and plan to share how I maneuver them with flair, optimism and humor. 

Let's dig into old photos and show you me back then and me now. 

Total disclosure, the top picture in my kimono was taken few years post first Van Gogh Chica, but I could not find one for those years. The bottom picture is from 2023. Hair is thinner. And I am softer and fluffier, lol. And I pretty much do not wear heels anymore, which I had on my cute feet in  above photo. The kimono  pic was taken by a date who came to my place for a rewndez vous.  I was feeling myself in a Hugh Hefner-esque sexy pajama look. I still love kimonos and sensual lingerie but not so much 3"+ heels anymore.

I am now a silver fox but I cover my grays and you only see them peeking when it is time for a root touchup. Also, I wear much less makeup than I did 20 years ago. Back then, I worked in cosmetics so I wore a full face of makeup for work and play. Aside from the fact that I can't see well enough without my glasses to do great eye makeup, I now prefer lash extensions and very light makeup. Still love lipstick though.

I am not as fit as I was  back then. Due to the effects of rheumatoid arthritis and other GI issues, I have not been able to return to the active walking, cycling, weight training and swimming I once did regularly. Now, I aim for chair yoga and aquacize. Hope for more in the future.

Now, I have a a medication arsenal that is very taxing. The rheumatoid arthritis medications are a light form of chemotherapy (methotrexate, hydroxychloroquin, leflunomide). It is a double edge sword. I am so grateful for the lessening of daily fevers, exhaustion and severe overall pain; but in return, I am debilitated with GI issues and a severely lowered immunity. So my health issues weigh heavy on my spirit and body these days.

In the earlier Van Gogh Chica, I championed a sex positive feminist lifestyle. I am still the same sexy and fun spirit, just in a 61year old body. That is a trip. I totally feel our societal erasure of older women's sexuality. I buck against that. And menopause has packed a whallop to my  eminine identity. I'll write about that here too.

So, bookmark this blog and come back to me.  Drop me a line if you want. (but trolls will not be tolerated.) I'm baaaaaack.